A Little Passion Can Go a Long Way

Do any (or maybe all) of these goals sound familiar?

When I reflect on my SmartMouth years (15, to be exact, this month!), and all that I’ve learned from working with an incredibly diverse and absolutely fascinating client base, I would have to say the ultimate game-changer and live-saver for speakers coincidentally comes from the organ we can’t live without … our hearts. 

The key to all of the above goals – being a better storyteller, being impactful, connecting, inspiring, and grabbing attention – is to use, and speak from, our hearts. Nothing engages an audience quite like passion. Genuine love, excitement, dedication, energy, and drive can win over audiences under any circumstance.

Consider a few common presentation situations:

Hostages. When people choose to be in the room for your presentation, you have a naturally more attentive audience. When people have not chosen to be in the room and are what I call hostages, it creates special challenges around grabbing and holding attention. Without question, though, a speaker who is passionate and energized about the topic will have a much better chance of grabbing and holding attention even when the audience is only mildly interested in the topic or, worse, not interested at all. With an impassioned delivery, a room of hostages will leave with a good impression of the speaker at the very least.

Presenting Up. Presenting to people who may be more knowledgeable or experienced than you can be daunting. Capturing their attention is hard. Wanting to impress them feels urgent. Yet they know more than you do. So how on earth are you supposed to hold their attention? Honestly, the best thing you can do is to open your heart, be vulnerable, transparent, and excited. Let your audience in, engage them with your eagerness for your work and where you are in it. It will be infectious.

Dry Material. Let’s face it, some presentations deal with material that is dry. Period. If you can share a story – an anecdote, example, or case study – it will do two things. First, it will illustrate the importance or usefulness of your dry material. Second, it will animate your voice and body, bringing out even the most latent passion. If you don’t have any stories to add color, then think about (and rehearse!) infusing your delivery with energy and physical animation, demonstrating a keen interest in or commitment to your topic, and/or telling the audience how genuinely pleased you are to be speaking with them and thank them graciously for their attention to the dry material.

When you make a presentation, you’re hoping to generate interest in your topic. Passion is simply a demonstration of your own interest in the topic. If you want others to be interested, I think it’s only fair that it begins with you. Don’t fake your passion, you don’t have to. Tap into it, it’s very likely close to the surface and accessible to you!

2020 marks SmartMouth’s 15th year in business

Dear Friends of SmartMouth,

Happy New Year, I hope this year and decade bring you lots of opportunities to shine … especially at the front of the room! 

On our end, 2020 marks SmartMouth’s 15th year in business – hard to believe but also very satisfying. Our client list continues to grow, and our engagements continue to be rewarding. We’ve added several enhancements to our trainings over the past two years, all of which have been well received so far. Complementing our in-person coaching and training is our app, as well as our online courses on OpenSesame and GO1. On the publishing side, my regular columns in Forbes.com join Jock Talk in helping to expand the reach of the SmartMouth approach. 

In an effort to maintain balance and quality, I plan to scale back the SmartMouth blog post and newsletter to once a month, rather than twice. Starting this month, you can look for a nugget of advice on communication skills and style on the third Thursday of the month. I hope you’ll continue to follow and read!

In gratitude for your loyalty and friendship.

 
All my best,

Q4 Challenge

It doesn’t take much to be a good leader-communicator. Perfection may be elusive, but being good enough to earn the admiration of your team are well within reach. Adherence to a few core principles takes care of most situations.

In my book Jock Talk: 5 Communication Principles for Leaders as Exemplified by Legends of the Sports World, I walk readers through the philosophy behind, and application of, these 5 principles: Audience-centricity, Transparency, Graciousness, Brevity, and Preparedness.

Taken together, they send two really important messages about you to your audience: 1) that you care about and respect them, and 2) that you’re real and therefore credible and trustworthy.

Audience-centricity is probably the most fundamental of the five principles. Simply put, audience-centricity is making the audience’s interests and experience a top priority in the planning and execution of a talk. Too many speakers prepare and deliver what is important and interesting to themselves without enough careful consideration of their listeners. Being audience-centric is a mindset shift that encourages the speaker to prepare and deliver content in a way that will matter to and resonate with the audience.

Transparency is exactly what you think it is; it’s about being open and direct—yes, and honest, too. Transparency is critical. It contributes to the levels of sincerity and trust that are accorded to you by your audience.

Graciousness is the art, skill, and willingness to be kindhearted, fair, and polite. As motivators and influencers, love and peace work far better than hate and war. Speaking in positives rather than negatives leaves lasting, favorable impressions. 

Brevity is a crowd-pleaser and needs no further introduction.

Preparedness speaks for itself as well, especially because the unprepared speaker is the one who is most likely to be longwinded, not to mention unfocused. While the mere thought of preparation might bring on feelings of dread or even impossibility, there are ways to prepare that take only seconds but that can greatly enhance a speaker’s effectiveness.

As you settle in for the homestretch toward year-end, I would encourage you to pick one of these principles as your personal pet project for the remainder of Q4. Which one of these 5 do you feel like you need to improve on the most? Or which one of these 5 would have the most impact on your business if you strengthened it? Pick one and go for it!

New Agey Advice for Nervousness

New Agey Advice for Nervousness

Let’s cut to the chase on nerves and public speaking by first dispensing with the platitudes we typically hear on the subject.

It’s not enough for you to know that the nervousness you feel before a presentation is your adrenaline getting you ready to do well. That doesn’t really help you, does it?

It’s also not enough to know that literally everyone feels the same way in the first two minutes of a presentation. That’s not helpful either, right?

Or that you just shouldn’t worry about it, you’ll do fine. Not very helpful.

Hearing these attempts to rationalize your experience is akin to being terribly sick with the flu and hearing “it’s a really bad flu season this year,” or “it’s been making the rounds, everyone has it.” Those may be true statements but they’re not a cure for your body’s misery.

Given that there’s also no cure for nerves in public speaking, I’d like to offer some new agey advice, a new angle on an old problem. Here are four ways to create your own zen space while delivering a presentation – keeping you present, at peace, and minimizing unnecessary distractions:

Use your breath. Two steps: 1) Deep breath in. 2) Nice, long exhale out. Sounds silly but it’s real. A good long exhale releases tension in your body, which can make you feel better. Never mind specifics about what to do with your abs or lungs, just take some deep breaths and let out a few good, long exhales. It will relieve and release the tension you feel. Repeat, as necessary.

Use your energy. Focus on your audience rather than on yourself. I mean really stop thinking about yourself. Give them, not yourself (and all your crazy nervous thoughts about forgetting what you want to say or what people are thinking about you), your energy. Turn your attention to them, look at them, move closer to them, talk to them. Surrender your attachment to how well you’re doing or to your material. Instead, connect with THEM. 

Set an intention. Set an intention for yourself by imagining ahead of time the type of speaker you want to be in the room – e.g. relaxed, conversational, commanding, confident, approachable, entertaining. Picture yourself being that speaker. Your intention becomes a goal, an ideal, you will be setting for yourself and gives you positive imagery to use as a guide while you speak.

Be mindful. Use mindfulness to acknowledge and accept your nervousness, being gentle and compassionate with yourself, rather than push it away or deny it. Resistance creates suffering. Don’t resist, simply accept. Know that your nerves will accompany you on this journey that is your presentation. It’s natural, it’s you, it’s okay. One of the definitions of zen is to be relaxed and not worrying about things you cannot change. 

Taken all together – breathing, turning yourself and your attention over to the audience, visualizing an ideal, and accepting rather than resisting your nerves – might not be a cure but employing these techniques over time will make your public speaking nerves more tolerable initially and then eventually, totally manageable.

Om. 

 

Info = Reduction of Uncertainty

Info = Reduction of Uncertainty

I was captivated recently by an article in National Geographic’s Secrets of Animal Communication. In particular, this passage on the first page really stuck with me:

Communication might even be conceived … as anything that’s evolved to transmit information, with “information” defined as a reduction of uncertainty. Understood in this way, communication is found in the speckles on a trout’s flank and the courtship displays of whooping cranes, the abdomen-wagging dances of honeybees and – yes – monkey alarm calls … Cues, signals, messages – communication is everywhere, and life is a constant gathering of information. 

A constant gathering of information, thereby reducing uncertainty. Amazing definition! At a very primal level, information is meant to reduce the unknowns, to guide us, to give us signals – via sight and sound – for knowing, deciding, engaging. Wow, let’s hold that thought for a minute.

When we gather information – in meetings and presentations – does it typically reduce uncertainty? Doesn’t it sometimes (or often) increase uncertainty? Obfuscate? Blur? Confuse? 

What if we shared information only with the intention, or to the extent, that we would reduce uncertainty – or, to be more positive about it – to ensure certainty? Instead of giving in to the urge to be thorough or to prove that we’re the smartest person in the room, we would communicate – with our body language and our words – more deliberately and strategically, wouldn’t we?

We would indeed. So here are three of SmartMouth’s tips to help us be more deliberate and strategic with our information:

1. Cues. The best way to reduce uncertainty is to guide your audience each step of the way. Tell them when your introduction is over, when you’re making and concluding your first main point, when you’re digressing to tell a story, when you’re transitioning from one point to another, and when something you’re saying is more important than the rest. Drop little breadcrumbs along the way so they can track and know where you are and what they’re supposed to remember.

2. Signals. Decide that you’re going to show up, be present and let the audience know you want to be with them. If you make a conscious decision ahead of time that you’re going to relax and enjoy your time, it is more likely to happen and your audience is more likely to engage with you. And smile – it’s probably the best non-verbal signal you can send.

3. Messages. Information, defined as evidence, background or detail, is meant to support a point or message. Know your what your message is, and then, to support it, decide how much and what kind of information your audience can tolerate and digest … in order to reduce uncertainty. TMI, or too much information, is in the eye of the beholder, your audience! (Ask yourself: are they in the room by choice or obligation? If by choice, you have more latitude with info; if by obligation, limit it.)

Check yourself and be honest: Are you reducing uncertainty when you speak and share information or are you making the waters murkier for your audiences? We get a lot of wisdom about ourselves from our observations of the animal kingdom, but this particular gem, that info = reduction of uncertainty, is particularly poignant in a world of TMI. Like animals, our communication is via sight and sound, so let’s make sure we reduce uncertainty with both.